fitforafemme.com

Hello, Birdie!
Hello, Jonesey!
Hello, Part Five of Anna Karenina!

When I first posted about my awesome new book club in early September, well…the past is in the past, darlings. My life only goes one way, and that’s forward. Or something. I’ve learned to ignore the book-themed catcalls and barks of sexual harassment from the vermin at the BART station I arrive at on my way home (honestly, it doesn’t matter one whit what you do, girls, they’ll find something reprehensible to groan in your direction), and I swan I stood in front of my car door for a full four and a half pages to finish a chapter before unlocking it and getting inside because I could not force myself to stop reading.

IT’S THAT GOOD.

I mean, it’s obviously been lauded as one of the greatest novels ever written but I know some of y’all are guilty of letting your copies collect dust, so I’m just saying. As our wonderful friends at Autostraddle say, READ ALL THE BOOKS.

Speaking of internets, I recently gave some tips on finding and keeping lesbian friends and you should read it – beyond my own, there are lots of great tips and resources for finding smart, like-minded hotties in your neighborhoods!

Halloween is almost upon us, and aside from our it-sounds-better-to-talk-about-it-than-to-actually-do-it idea of being Rose and Nat from The Real L Word, I’m hard-up for a good costume idea. We’ve carved a batch of splendid pumpkins, though, and I’ve customized nearly all of our baby pumpkins. The candy bowl is quivering in anticipation and there are little DIY ghosts swinging in the breeze outside, all spooky-like. What are your plans? (Keep reading for some ideas of where to go in SF and a little FFAF festiveness. )

I know a lot of you have already heard me say this 84,000 times today, but I am really loving this new song by Crystal Castles and Robert Smith (The Cure, but y’all should know that). He sounds perfect, and it’s a deliciously gloomy track. It’s a cover/remix of a Canadian new wave band’s 1983/1984 original Not In Love.

It makes me want to dance on a tiny, smoky, filthy dance floor with too much whiskey and scabby knees under my skirt.

Raw silk tunic: Banana Republic
Riding pants: The Gap
Belt: Vintage
Boots: Donald J. Pliner
Earrings: Ancient, but I love the wee pewter disco balls swaying beneath the massive heart!

I forgot to mention the Party On! Gaga party on Friday night! Bad FFAF! Here you go, kittens:

Now tell me all about your amazing costumes and Halloween plans!!!

Hot damn, y’all, it’s Friday! A pretty one, too, at least here in San Francisco, which means I ought to be sipping sangria at Cafe Flore, not sitting here in my workout clothes after combining a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Boot Camp workout with one of Jillian Michaels 30-Day Shred sessions. (In case you’re wondering why in God’s name I’d do such an awful thing, it’s because I totally punked out on an awesome Bikram Yoga deal yesterday – 20 sessions for $20! I could faint! I hate wearing sports bras! Someone might accidentally sweat on me! It might smell really, really bad! I’d have to buy a yoga mat, and I have no idea where one does that! See?! SO HARD. If you have strong feelings about it, however, feel free to try and convince me – I might scoop up the next deal I see instead of losing my nerve like a chickenshit so-and-so!)

By the way, did you know Kim Kardashian has OnDemand Fitness videos? She’s kind of sad and apologizes a lot, and wears a ton of make-up AND a corset during workouts. Maybe it’s meant to be more like soft core porn than anything…uh…effective.

Choosing is hard!

In easier, breezier news, we’re headed to the charming wine country town of Healdsburg for some much-needed family time and a change of scenery this weekend. I haven’t seen my folks there in ages and I miss them terribly. It’s supposed to rain, but I’m holding out hope that the weather will continue to be kind to us!

PS. Not sure which loser setting my camera was on that it took such PALE pictures of me, with such insanely comic book blue-black hair, but I’ll try to avoid it in the future. For all our sakes.

I’d talk about how abhorrent The Lovely Bones is, but I prefer to discuss pleasant things. Like the fact that we’ve all kicked off a three-day weekend. Like the fact that I came home to a cheeky tomboy with a gorgeous bouquet of blush roses just for me, and lasagna baking in the oven, and an array of tiny Haagen-Dazs cups of ice cream in the freezer, bottles of bubbly chilling in the fridge and fat, happy cinnamon rolls waiting to be baked in the morning for breakfast. Very pleasant things.

I’m going to curl up with my newest collection of locally penned shorts (Instant City, Issue No. 6, snagged at Gypsy Honeymoon in the Mission) in bed, with a brand new sparkling cocktail that is so, so good: splash of spiced pear vodka (ours is crafted by Hangar One, of course), splash of raspberry pink lemonade, topped with your sparkling beverage of choice. Not-too-sweet, perfectly crisp and refreshing!

Confession: Since I will be attending a local fashion show tonight to review AND shoot it for my new gig, I must away, for I’ve an appt. in an hour with the Aveda people to get my locks cut. Question: Will Skinny slice and dice her long tresses for summer, or just leave them be save a modest trim and touch-up? OH, GOD. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

Scent: L’Artisan Fleur de Narcisse. Something must be up, because this is the second fragrance in a row that I’ve felt is lacking in sweetness. Normally, I find things too sweet! Granted, this is before the dry down, but still. There’s the pristine white floral, something dry and cedar-y and almost smoky, a stern edge. Blond tobacco! Leather! The last note surprises me, while the others – narcissus, hay, hyacinth, blond tobacco, iris, blackcurrant bud, moss – do not. One review said that it’s rather like a roll in the hay, or “…think of Lady Chatterley and her gamekeeper and you will have a very good idea of what goes on in Fleur de Narcisse.” I beg to differ. There is no forbidden sex here. At least not on my skin! (Well, you know what I mean.) I would wear this to a friend’s wedding with a lovely, elegant dress on a summer’s day. That’s what it’s like to me. Well-behaved, beautiful and serene.

PS. Perhaps I like my leathers to be too aggressive, doused in gasoline and dragged through dirty, rumbled linens. Who can say? If anything, this is new leather, not yet begging to be broken in. Is it Friday? Are we talking about sex? Huh? What? Nothing!
PPS. I meant rumpled, of course, but have decided that rumbled works just as well. Sometimes it’s less a roll than a rumpus!

When: Monday, Sept. 29th, 2008.

What: Silk blouse by Chelsea Flower (I recently discovered them and love their pretty, floaty tops and dresses. Find your own here or here!). Purple velvet tiered skirt with embroidered flowers by BCBG Max Azria. Belt from modcloth.com and hot pink pumps by Chinese Laundry.

Confession: I had total gay arm in the photo with my pretty chestnut leather Hobo Int’l clutch. Anyway, here it is. The gay arm and the clutch! Pretty, right? The clutch, I mean. Not the unfortunate positioning of my hand. I blame all of this on Mad Men. I noticed it earlier this evening when I was buzzing myself into the building. “Petite,” I said, “is my hand always like this?” She glanced at it and started giggling maniacally, but eventually she said no. See? TOTES BIRDIE’S FAULT.

Speaking of, she is kind of bad ass, so YES PLEASE:

Here are partial photos of the Badgley Mischka dress I have decided to reject as a candidate to the grand old soirree coming up in a few weeks. I am DJing a dear friend’s wedding. Of course, I need a dress that is both flattering and very comfortable. This one was lovely, but the winner was lovelier! It just wasn’t meant to be.

Besides, I’ve already got the perfect shoes to go with the winner! (Alas, I am in dire need of the perfect strappy, elegant silver heels. Suggestions?)