fitforafemme.com

Oh, lookie! The what and when are noted! All that’s left is the confession, and scent, if applicable. Have I done Parfumerie Generale’s Querelle? No? Well, today is just as good a day as any. Here are the notes: citruses, Iranian black caraway, myrrh, cinnamon, Haittian vetiver, incense, oakmoss, and ambergris. Some consider this to be an evil scent. Some consider it an haute couture scent. It is complex and intimidating and all day long (you can ask M) it would jump out at me out of nowhere, seemingly, and I would feel as though someone was challenging me to a fight. Delicious. Absolutely fucking spectacular. It is violent, it is dirty, it is deeply unnerving. I absolutely love it. The best part? My other sniffs fiend friend unloaded it on me because she loathed it so (she says it smelled like “vetiver ass” on her) – on me, she truly appreciates it.

(Oh, and this is for Jen: We had Caesar salad bib lettuce cups, mini burgers with white cheddar, beef tartare with spicy Thai red curry, kaffir lime oil, sesame crackers, lamb chops and very, very spicy pommes frites for dinner at Lime tonight. So good. Also? Eight dessert “bites” as follows: three mocha creme brulee cups, two dark chocolate-dipped cheesecake pops, one each of the strawberry cream, brownie a la mode and red velvet baby cupcake.)

When: Saturday, Jan. 31st, 2009.

Femme What: Black velvet frock trimmed with embroidered ribbon, Free People. White tank by Mimi & Coco. Boots from Lamica, black ribbon headband from Target and skull-and-pearls necklace by Betsey Johnson.

Femme Scent: Vera Wang’s Princess, with notes as follows: Water Lily, Lady Apple, Mandarin Meringue, Golden Apricot Skin, Ripe Pink Guava, Tahitian Flower, Wild Tuberose, Dark Chocolate, Pink Frosting Accord, Precious Amber, Forbidden Woods, Royal Musk Captive, Chiffon Vanilla. I like this for a sweet and girly casual day scent that’s not too cloying or heavy. It’s nice and light, with enough going on to keep it from being boring and really good staying power.

Femme Confession: It appears, quite tragically, that I am not a fan of scotch. ‘Tis a pity! M brought a rather nice bottle home last night, along with heart-shaped chocolates from local chocolatiers Joseph Schmidt and wee tiles of solid milk and dark chocolate from Charles Chocolates! Perhaps it’s just the Islay variety – something in the peatiness, maybe – but not only did the taste not sit well with me, just the whiff off the cork made me feel boozy right away! Anyway, here’s an invitation to come visit us and help M drink this very lovely bottle of Lagavulin 16-Year Scotch:

Tomboy What: RVCA jeans, white guayabera bought in Old San Juan, PR. Mahogany Italian boots that are totally falling apart bought I have no idea where, vintage Yves Saint Laurent sangria tie with sea horsies bought at the bombass flea market.

Tomboy Confession: I woke up craving chilaquiles in green sauce even though I mostly only ever eat the kind in red sauce, so we went to Citron for brunch. They came with pulled pork and a very spicy salsa. I feel great about my breakfast, and am looking forward to the samosa parade later, and sliders tomorrow. The skinny one is not wearing underwear. There is scotch in the liquor cabinet. This sports weekend is going spectacularly!

When: Thurs., Dec. 11th, 2008.

What: Scarf by H&M, white cotton ‘beater by Mimi & Coco, black jumper by French Toast, floral black lace tights from Target. Vintage oversized clutch and patent pumps by MaxStudio.

Confession: I picked this jumper up at a thrift store for $1.50, I think. It’s fucking POLYESTER. Awesome. It’s a standard issue girls uniform, yo. For realsies, go to the website, it comes in navy, too! For $16.98 or something ridiculous. Anyway, I wore this last night to a ROCK EMO SHOW. You see, a local radio station put on an event with Death Cab For Cutie, The Killers, Franz Ferdinand and Bloc Party on the bill. It was fun, and Death Cab smoked the other bands, though Franz Ferdinand put on a really good show (their wardrobes were a great disappointment, though). I was disappointed by The Killers and sort of ‘meh’ on Bloc Party, despite the fact that their drummer boy had on neon pink and green shorts on the whole time. Perhaps most amusing is that at 7pm I was totally fine without a sweater or coat or anything, but as the night went on I was forced to put on the VIP hoodie each of us was given when we arrived. IT GOT SO COLD. They said it’s going to get really cold here and could even snow at 1500 ft. on Bay Area mountaintops! (Go ahead, all you freezing femmes – throw snowballs at my spoiled California ass!)

When: Friday (I’m in love), July 11th, 2008.

What: James Cured by Seun jeans, white lace-trimmed tank from Mimi & Coco, plaid blouse from the Gap. Black patent and gray suede belt with silver hardware from Tristan. Mary Jane wingtip shoes by Linea Paolo from Nordstrom and various silver jewelry (clang-clang-clang) from Juniper Tree and Spoiled in Oakland, CA.

Confession: As soon as I slipped my shoes on and made my way to the door this morning, M was all “YAH! Shiny punk rock cowgirl!” and I looked at her, pursing my lips. I didn’t realize I was emulating (snicker) a cowgirl look. Quite frankly, I ripped the whole concept off a DKNY ad, but you know what? COWGIRLS UP!

The shiny comment was with regard to all the noise caused by my wristwear (that term drove me nuts when Lucky or Elle or whoever the fuck decided it was OK back in late Winter/early Spring ’08, and I use it here mockingly) – a pile of hammered silver bangles with a massive silver pyramid bracelet that clacks loudly whenever I move my arm abruptly. Like a teacher banging a ruler down on a desk.

Denim-only Confession: Can we talk about denim? This hurts me, because I have around $1200 in Blue Cult jeans loitering in my closet, and I can’t wear them. I CAN’T WEAR THEM. They are one inch smaller in size than the jeans pictured here. Just the one, and that inch (it’s an angry one, cue Hedwig!) is the difference between nice and snug and hugging my revered ass just right, and offending people and making fancy denim lovers everywhere cry for my pants. O seams so stretched, O dry-aged organic denim tortured with thy thighs! For some reason, I have another pair of the Seun jeans in the taunting smaller size, and they fit me just fine. Hmph. I am going to the gym now.

Side note: I don’t know WTF is wrong with my camera, but my pictures from this week don’t feel as crispy as previous ones. I will tinker with it but for now: SONY, I FUCKING HATE YOU! Eat a bag of dicks. Here is a special treat for the charming Kelly Alice – a close-up of the shoes! She also suggested a shoe feature, which I hope to incorporate here very soon:

Hopefully, I’ll be back on Sunday with fun weekend outfits! I have special events (a date!), so OOOH!