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The above just blew your mind, I know, so here’s a clockwise from top left explanation:

• M reading the menu at Sparky’s. I was so adamant about pancakes, but we ended up splitting a massive chicken parm.
• M pouting over agonizing eye wear choices at the chic and friendly Eye Dare office.
• M demonstrated her best DeNiro squint and a delicious graham cracker.
• Boots the kitten comes when we call her over. So does Scab. And Pimp Gandalf, but not Blanket.
• Pretty damn good chicken parm for a 24-hour diner. Plus, cute gay waiter boys and singing patrons.
• The creepy doll that greets you at Sparky’s.
• Some street art/porn to keep the Valencia sidewalk extension project construction workers* motivated.
• The mystery palm that showed up overnight in our little garden. Weird!

This is the day we walked over 3 miles! I really, really love our meandering walks through the Mission and surrounding ‘hoods like Bernal, Noe and Castro. We pop in and out of cute shops and boutiques, we giggle, we eat, we drink, we cross a few items off of our To Do list, we people watch, we peruse real estate, we mussy-sikk, we’re RIDICULOUS. It’s just completely spontaneous, unplanned bliss, and neither of us cares much that we said we’d be here or there or “should” be somewhere else. It’s what the best weekends are made of!

What are your best weekends made of in your neighborhood? (Otherwise, let’s face it, we’d all say something absurd like BORA BORA!)

*I am sure this is not the official name of the project.
**My ankles don’t even BELONG to me, they’re so shockingly white. No, seriously. Look at them. What the hell?!

Confession: I first noticed this poster months ago, right after we elected Obama, I think. It’s stuck onto the front of a massive electrical unit, which hums rather loudly despite the fact that the 880 is a few yards away. I knew I wanted it as a focal point for a blog post but it just didn’t want to happen. Until today! I don’t know, I love it. I love that it’s red, white and blue, I love that it says DONE, I love that it’s got that prick SOB’s face on it and that the words “shining beacon of hope” are tucked into the lower right corner, for one to interpret however they best wish. I hope that I am posting this before the message is too obsolete, though I don’t think – as a person, a woman and a mother, a lesbian, nor for the country as a whole – that it can ever truly be obsolete at all. What do y’all think? Any similarly awesome political street art in your ‘hoods?

Scent: These are so fancy and awesome that I’m writing them up instead of a new fragrance. They are candles and they smell incredible. I wanted Stonehenge (smoked cedarwood and amber), which was much more handsome and gentleman’s parlor, but M picked Havana, which would have been my second choice – for the tobacco leaf and bergamot notes. They are potent but not overpowering, pretty to look at and eco-friendly (I think). Get your own Archipelago goodies here!

For a little bit of Oakland, pics of our delicious brunch at Somerset and more, check out the slideshow!

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When: Sunday, July 13th, 2008.

What: Elie Tahari ruffled yellow sundress with vintage belt from Down At Lulu’s. Carlos peep-toe pumps. Buttery leather clutch with green silk interior handmade by the lovely Jenna, beaded necklace also handmade by an old ya-ya friend and Oscar de la Renta sunglasses. Wanna see the necklace up close?

Confession: In these photos my hair is soaking wet and without product, the bangs twisted back into clips and the bulk twisted into a messy bun. Hangover hair. See, yesterday I spent the afternoon outdoor drinking with some friends new and old, which became indoor drinking at the Lexington, which became drinking-dancing at Cockblock until they booted us out at 2am. Much fun was had by all, but Franziskaner pitchers + Margarita pitchers + Ketel One cosmos + adorable pink cans of Sofia Coppola champs = Dirty dancing, and other things.

I don’t have a picture of that outfit, which consisted of skinny blue jeans from Zara tucked into cowboy boots and a completely backless top from Glow on Lakeshore Ave., but here is the prettiest part of the top (and my new plant, because she is so clearly high fashion):

Note from a femme: Welcome to my tomboy! This is her first post, so greet her sweetly! (I know y’all will, you damn HOORS.) She’ll take over from here.

Before & After

Let me explain. I have been fighting with the femme for weeks now; I insist that I need a haircut, she insists that I do not. Please see the “before” photo(s):

I was well on my way to a hard-core Mexi-mullet, complete with inexplicable FEATHERING. WTF?! Also? I look like a lopsided toadstool from the Mario video games. (I know this because over the last 3 weeks or so I have logged some 40-odd hours playing Super Paper Mario : Thousand Year Door and asking the femme to find hints for me on-line — she’s such a good girlfriend!)

It was about 900 degrees Fahrenheit in Oakland today, and once again, I threatened to cut my own hair. The femme finally relents, so I dressed up for the shoot and cut. [I shopped at nearby fabulous Rockridge vintage & contemporary boutique Pretty Penny. -Femme]

Observe how much more handsome I look POST-haircut. I even look like I smell clean! My hair is now tidy and well-behaved. And look, I have ears! No more toadstool head! I feel much better, and encourage all of you to join me in a whiskey on the rocks. Cheers.

When: Sat., June 21st, 2008

Tomboy What (some facts, loosely based on reality): Seersucker shorts from Express for Men, H&M military shirt and belt, O’Neill flip flops and the tie actually belongs to the femme. Breitling Chronographe watch (bought in NYC while hungover in the street). Vintage silver & black Equestrian tie clip.

Femme What: Dress by Mango, vintage brown leather belt with embossed spring flowers from Down At Lulu’s, Nocona cowboy boots. Sunglasses by Oscar de la Renta, vintage onyx necklace.

[Confession: That awesome skinny black tie with the cute little olive green skull & crossbones? Hot Topic. Shut up. - Femme]