fitforafemme.com

We woke up to the wonderful sound of rain falling softly on the roof and down the gutters, the morning light grey and dim. It made us hit the snooze button three times, pretty sure it’s what caused us to eat dessert for breakfast, and why we decided to make a second batch of coffee around noon. It feels like Christmastime!

It’s not, of course, it’s Veteran’s Day and Remembrance Day and 11/11/11 and also the day which most closely resembles corduroy and probably I’ve left something out, but there you go.

I’m just hoping it eases up by tomorrow morning, because we’ve got a two-hour horseback ride situation in Half Moon Bay, M & I. We’re supposed to still show up if it’s just drizzling a little bit, and I’m kind of hoping it does because it sounds dreamy. M would wear her puffer vest and I’d wear one of my faux fur ones with my Ralph Lauren sweater and riding boots and…oh! I’m getting carried away.

A friend of mine noted that it was a perfect day for listening to The Cure’s Disintegration, so I did and it kicked off a little Cure-fest. It’s such a fantastic record, and after it ended I popped in my DVD of The Cure’s Greatest Hits videos. My favorites are Boys Don’t Cry, Lovecats and Cut Here. Some days nothing but The Cure will do!

I love this outfit, it’s all the dark browns and blues and different textures, I think. We’re still in that lovely phase of Fall where bare legs still work as long as one is reasonably bundled up elsewhere, tights optional. Also, this ponytail makes my hair look ridiculously long. It’s not that long, I just had it trimmed not long ago!

See my riding helmet? It’s too tight. I need another one for my big old noggin’, boo. The skirt is Ann Taylor and I adore it. It’s the perfect hue of navy and has a little sheen to the quilted texture, and it fits like a glove. The pussy bow blouse is vintage and a lovely dove grey, the same exact color of today’s sky! The wool blazer with elbow patches is from H&M L.O.G.G. and has the prettiest printed lining (pics below). It’s a colorful kind of paisley with birds situation, really cute.

Y’all know these shoes by now, my Linea Paolo mega-babes, and how serious is this darling little satchel from Asos?! I’m still in love with it. We mean business.

Smoky blue ring from Pretty Penny, rawr necklace from Mariele Ivy. My Remington and pretty Zoya nails in Lo, a warm medium pink with just a smidgen of coral. I hope y’all have super fun weekends planned, check back soon for a little loverbird action – we have matching Everlane tees to show off, whee!

CONFESSION: So much! (Such words.) The new hair! The new boots! The never-seen-before couch that so many beloved friends have slept upon! The under-appreciated brown suede tote bag from a Banana Republic sale years and years ago, and still it serves me well! Come in, sit down, have a drink. I’ve got so much news.

First things first, the holiday party I threw last night for work went swimmingly. (If you’re ever in town and want to grab a cocktail at a bar that perfectly melds art with liquor, please visit Madrone. Don’t forget to call me so that I can join you!)

On a whim, I popped into Buffalo Exchange and found not just one but two pairs of fantastical brown boots – a dark chocolate pair of riding boots ($16) in lovingly worn leather and these nutmeg suede, pointy-toed wonders. Love. I still have the gorgeous, supple, high-heeled Donald J. Pliners, but these are great for day-to-day traipsing around.

I wore them tonight to a very special scotch tasting, hosted by Glenrothes at Foreign Cinema (which had even MORE great art). It was great! In addition to the awesomely themed Blood & Sand cocktail, they had tastings of the 1991, 1985, 1975 and Special Reserve, and after a few brief and entertaining speeches and a few rounds of hip-hip-hooray, they cracked open an exceptional bottle of 1979 Single Cask (No. 3808, I think, but I could be wrong) and it was well worth the wait. M said she wouldn’t pay $1,000 (the asking price for one of the remaining 13 bottles left in the world – we drank the 14th tonight!), but could see how one very expensive bottle would last one a very long time. My search for the perfect Lowlands scotch marches on with just 29 days left in the year…

After saying goodbye to some fresh new friends, we popped into the adjacent Laszslo for a round of cocktails (M with her Bulleit on the rocks and me with my favorite, Grey Gardens), and I was suddenly STARVING despite an early dinner, so we popped into a taqueria on the way home for some much-needed Mexican fare.

By far the most incredible news of all is that I will be participating in the Impact Self-Defense Basics Course for Women this weekend. My friend is assisting the instructor and I couldn’t be more thrilled to finally, finally be taking this. (I believe an old therapist of mine suggested it way back in 2000-2001, I think, so it’s been a very long time coming.) Of course, y’all won’t judge me if my first thought upon confirmation was, “ZOMG, must go out and get new workout outfits ASAP!” It’s the one weak point in my entire wardrobe! So much to do before classes begin on Friday!

Hope y’all are surviving this freakishly long week after the long holiday weekend! XO!

Here are some pics from earlier tonight – look at that moon…

PS. Also?! THE CURE TRIBUTE AT NEW WAVE CITY THIS SATURDAY NIGHT! Most excellent. I can’t wait.

CONFESSION: Last night, I tried on two of those POS wanker Victoria’s Secret fragrances I got forever ago, with a pair of super soft, sexy pajamas (free slippers with purchase!). One was so gross and cloyingly sweet that M described it as “someone trying to layer on perfume over dirty ass” and I simply referred to it as a whore’s bath perfume. Seriously. I refuse to even bequeath it to anyone since it screams CRUSTY SLUT + EXCESS BRONZER. It’s called Ooh La La, but is more like Oh, Hell Nah. I really hope none of you like it, because I’m not going to feel bad and I’m not going to take it back, either! (Damn it, I just realized that I reviewed OLL in late December of last year, in Shovels & Lye. At least I’m consistent!?)

The Fragrance was No. 2, boasts top notes of crushed leaves, freesia, mandarin (What the fuck kind of leaves? Isn’t that sort of key?) and does begin rather citrus-y and benign. I had to give it another go-round today because Ooh La La sent my senses into a diabetic coma, but it doesn’t seem to change my opinion of it as a rather boring and one-hit wonder scent. Not even a good hit, either. Something Milli Vanilli-ish. (If I spelled that wrong, it’s b/c I refuse to google it for the proper spelling. Fakers don’t get my hits! I have standards.) It’s not offensive, just boring. Very un-sexy. For instance, Laura Bush should totally check this out. It’s perfect for her.

From the Dream Angels collection comes Wish, which is TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME if you want to smell like orange sherbet ice cream and baby powder, and reminds me of back in the day when my folks would take us to Baskin Robbins on special occasions, and someone would be like, “Oh, you should have some water,” and I’d be all, “The fuck for? I drink my water in Kool-Aid, man. Step off, my peanut-butter-and-chocolate ice cream cone is melting.” Or, you know, changing diapers. Also, it irks me that something so vile has to share the same word with a stellar The Cure album, but what are you gonna do?

Someone at the VS fragrance think tank needs to ground themselves from citrus for, like, a year, and then get back to me.

PS. Ain’t much to say about this outfit ‘cept there’s a mean cold snap this week and mama needs to go SHOPPING. I do, however, have a new brown sheath dress that is super Joan Holloway and was recently procured at the thrift store for FIDDY MOFO CENTS, YO. Holla / Coming Soon.

PPS. What the hell is up with the Christian Siriano for VS make-up collection? When the cover model on the website looks kind of rough in all your war paint, dude, you need to step up your game. Do any of y’all have it? Is it good? Not that I’m in the market…my quick beauty fix lately has been a dusting of Cargo bronzer as a wash over the entire lid, with heavy-handed mascara at the lash base instead of eyeliner. Fresno and Coral Beach are my favorites right now, but it seems the former is discontinued. SOB.

PPSS. Lips? Besame’s Red Velvet. Creamy and subtle red for when MAC’s Russian Red is too much damn work.

(Okay, so maybe that the gayest obscure Cure reference ever made in the history of life, but read on. Please.)

Here’s the thing, kittens. There will always be those who see life and those living it in a more black & white fashion, and then there are those who innately grasp at the grays and gradations. That’s important to remember before walking across the plains of anyone’s identity – we never know where potential landmines are buried until, well, until we know.

And, really, let’s face it – it’s not worth running your Yves Saint Laurent Volume Effet Faux Cils over, you know? So, please donate to the fight against Prop. 8 right now. Seriously. Your friends and lovers out here in California are fucking DAYS away from being stripped of their rights by a bunch of ignorant, fear-mongering bigots with deep pockets. Those fuckers just raised $3M. It’s insane.

DO NOT WANT.

HRC and EQCA and everybody else (the good guys) are trying to raise $3M to counter it by Friday night. Peep the Ugly Betty cast ad against Prop 8, then share it like crazy with everyone you know:

The Harvey Milk movie (starring Sean Penn) premiered in SF’s Castro last night (dude hotties abound in these pics, so have at it, all you peen-loving ladies).

Some POS motherfucker beat a gay with his YES ON PROP 8 sign whilst spitting out homophobic slurs in Torrance, CA.

Senator Dianne Feinstein has put out an ad urging Californians to vote No on Prop. 8, too:

Of course, the folks behind Prop. 8 are exploiting children to back their vile, hateful arguments. You may or may not have heard that some adorable (and deliriously happy) SF schoolchildren went on a field trip to see their lesbian teacher get married at City Hall in SF not long ago. Not only did Prop. 8 supporters stoop to terrible lows by attacking this otherwise wonderful and memorable learning experience to garner support, they went even lower by using video of the kids in their ads.

From the article:

In their letter to the Prop 8 campaign, the parents wrote: “We are absolutely outraged that you have chosen, without permission, to shamelessly hijack the images of our innocent children to promote a cause that we in no way, shape or form support. It is even more maddening that you have willfully and calculatingly edited the images of our children, with menacing music in the background, in a way that is completely contrary to their nature and harmful to them.”

Here’s a video about that (not the one w/ kids, I am NOT re-posting that awful shit):

Y’all? I am seriously, seriously, seriously freaking out and getting more tense and anxious with each passing day. I keep donating money I can’t really afford to donate to fight this shit. I have the feeling I will be spending lots of time at the field office downtown phone banking and stuff this weekend.

IF YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA, PLS. MAKE TIME TO VOLUNTEER AT A FIELD OFFICE NEAR YOU.

IF YOU CANNOT DONATE, AT LEAST CONSIDER SPREADING THE WORD.

Here is the list and contact info – if you don’t see anything near you or are having trouble, let me know and I’ll try and put you in touch with someone:

When: Friday, October 10th, 2008.

What: Tailored women’s shirt by Thomas Pink, skinny jeans from Zara, vintage scarf. Brown boots from Donald J. Pliner and brown suede tote bag from Banana Republic. Feather headband from Target and skull-and-pearls necklace from Betsey Johnson.

Confession: It took appx. five minutes to wrangle my ass into these jeans this morning. Maybe that should tell me something, but fuck it. Today felt like November, at last, and I needed these boots to feel it. These jeans go in these boots, period. The chill.

I listened to Louis XIV’s Air Traffic Control (go on, listen, it might surprise you) and The Cure’s Cut Here about 3 dozen times each and I made this:

Beauty soothes while love heals when the insanity of happenstance destroys. (LB)

Norton, I miss you. Earlier this week I said that life was cruel and lovely. I figured if anything was strong enough to carry so many memories and so much sadness and all the unanswered questions all at once, it would be my sturdy old Remington typewriter. (If I had a bike, I’d stick typewriter parts in there somewhere.) The femme has lost a friend. One week has passed.

How I made it through the day:

B: It changes everything forever but only in that you are a diamond and now one of your facets is deeply altered. It’s not an imperfection, but it’s such a change…Oh, life. I heart your crying, SBJ. It’s so brave.

SBJ: Do you? I suppose it is. It’s not as though it can be helped, though, I don’t think.

B: It is brave, and it’s important that you know that. There will come a day when there is another friend, and you will remember this pain and decide whether or not to be this brave again or to turn away from it, even incrementally. That is when you get to be even more brave and howl in pain until you once more stop, that facet deepened, your wisdom layered again. Even though you know how very, very bad it’s going to be, you must always scream and cry against the loss. It’s going to be one of the cornerstones of staying Skinny Bone Jones: your heart – none of it – can be allowed to turn to stone or wood. People have already tried, like your father, and you were stronger then – and you are stronger now. I have faith that you will go to your grave with a heart that rages and loves with purity, and not a heart with a cave at the back where cold things lie unattended.

1st Fit For A Femme FLASHBACK POST Ever! ZOMG!

When: Saturday, Aug. 11th, 2007.

What: I have no idea. Black!

Confession: M’s eyeliner was mentioned on the other day’s makeup post, and there was a request for pics! In the interests of pleasing my beloved readers, here are pics from The Cure Tribute Night at Club Gossip in SF, which is located at the Cat Club on 9th & Folsom. Good times. M & I met there on a crispy February night in 2005! Except on that night it was a lesbian club named Hot Pants, which still exists. Yay.

We try real hard to be moody, with little success, then we kind of nail it, but ruin it by cracking up. So not goth:

When: Sunday, September 21st, 2008.

What: Soft, fuzzy robe. Besame, NARS, Sephora, Cargo, etc.

Femme Confession: OK, not your typical lipstick lesbians, but M likes playing with my makeup. Now that we’re engaged, I figured she should be allowed to do mine from time to time. It’s fun! And yes, yes, totally fucking adorable. I taught her new tricks and the little look of awe on her face when she “got” it was priceless. Besides, it’s the least I could do after putting eyeliner on her for many a Cure tribute night.

M Confession: Firstly, I have never, ever put make-up on myself, nor have I had any desire to . A few times I have used an eye-lash curler, but it ripped out eye-lashes (hatessssssss it, master!). Then I let Jonesey put on eye-liner (see Cure night above) and it annoys my eyeballs and makes me blink. She says I should just shut up and sit still! Wellllll, now it is my turn!

Secondly, Jonesey has over a million make up things. I am not mistaken in this estimate. My favorite are the brushes. She has at least 15 of these. Even Picasso didn’t have that many. Just goes to show you what a hack he was. There are also bullet lipsticks, tricksy ninja lipsticks, lip stains (not to be confused with cheek stains, but they probably would work there too),  and hundreds of little tin petri dishes full of eye shadow. I tried to be real careful using all these and aside from a few mistakes, it was not bad for my first time! Jonesey sat real still (which never happens unless sex is involved somehow) and didn’t even looked worried!