fitforafemme.com

For some reason, I named this folder “Bunny Bun” in my Picasa, so there you have it. Maybe it’s because this bun is exceptionally fluffy, like a bunny tail. Who can say?! This was taken last Saturday, the kind of sunny, crispy Fall day where you can get away with bare legs, despite the fact that the day before we were all been bundled up in scarves, coats and gloves, braving the bay under surly skies.

I would like a few more of these days before winter takes hold, but the past few have been wrapped in fog thick enough to rile the mournful cries of foghorns, and we’re all braced for 70mph winds due tomorrow. Spooky! At least I’m well, having knocked that awful cold out with drugs or tea or bourbon or all three. (I’m sure M is convinced it’s the sidecar I had at the Lexington that healed me.)

Also? I have a confession: while I was running around today, I felt that sharp, distinct feeling of being ready to get the Christmas tree. Hooray! As I told a friend yesterday, I am SO excited about chopping down our own tree this year. LOOK OUT, YOU PRETTY SONS OF BITCHES, WE’RE COMING FOR YOU SOON! (If only I had this axe with which to chop it, and I must say I do prefer ax over axe, but I feel it behooves me to adhere to the spelling choice made by the company that makes the axes I so desire, alas.)

This is my HEY GIRL HEY face. Hey. So many baubles, where do I begin? Mariele Ivy necklace, the lipstick-y bullet cuff is from a little booth at a Portland market, the earrings are Asos and the ring is from H&M (and technically belongs to M, I believe). I’ve got my vintage Dooney & Bourke bag in tow and cozy brogues on again. The skirt, too, is vintage, and I paired it with my super soft  and very perfect Everlane v-neck tee and Sparkle & Fade cardigan. This was my “Oh, hey, let’s go to the movies!” outfit (and hair and makeup).

Tomorrow is the last day of November, and I would like December to be kinder. November’s been so cruel to far too many people I cherish, and it’s been kind of hard to take. I really want to be mindful of treasuring every single day in the coming month, for it’s the last of 2011! I can’t believe it, and 2012 holds so many uncertain (but exciting!) changes for us.

I’m ready (more than ready, actually), but for now, I just want to cradle this last month like a soft, sweet little kitten.

Love,

FFAF

First things first, today is the 13th annual International Transgender Day of Remembrance, so perhaps take just a moment to honor those no longer with us, support those we’re lucky enough to have in our lives today, and keep fighting transphobia. Amos Mac, of Original Plumbing and Translady Fanzine fame, wrote this touching piece about Gwen Araujo, and our friends at Autostraddle have a wonderful open thread going, and I really recommend checking out both!

Gwen was a 17-year-old local who was murdered in 2002 by four young men in a brutal hate crime, and hers was the first memorial of its kind that I’d ever attended. I remember it being very somber and despondent, and frighteningly unfamiliar (I was so sheltered then, still very much a baby dyke). However, it was also softly and sadly determined, for while a vivacious, courageous transgender teen was gone and would be deeply mourned by many, the community’s response was deafening: Gwen’s life would be remembered and celebrated with a strength that wouldn’t stop until it drowned out the ignorance and hatred that took it away.

Throughout all of this, a high school in Gwen’s town was putting on a production of The Laramie Project, and so an already badly shaken student body and faculty found themselves facing a different type of incomprehensible hate: Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist psychopaths.

I hardly remember how it happened or who I was with, but one night I found myself among the protective circle of Angel Action folks standing outside of the entrance Newark Memorial High School, wearing those big fluffy angel wings in the cold, all of us doing our best to shield the performers and audience members from those rotten sons of bitches. It was a really small, very tiny thing, but doing anything felt better than doing nothing in the wake of a tragedy like that.

(PS. I’m donating 25% of all sales this week to the Transgender Law Center, so go take a peek at my Etsy shop, Loverbirds, and shop for change…social change! Or go and buy an awesome t-shirt from Revel & Riot – a portion of all proceeds go to LGBTQ rights and equality groups, and they’ll make excellent stocking stuffers.)

In other news, it appears I’m getting sick. This is horrific timing, as I have two elaborate desserts to make for Thanksgiving, and a bit of tinkering yet to do for our signature Turkey Day cocktails! We’re also preparing for lots and lots of house guests, and I just haven’t got the time to be sick! DID I MENTION IT’S THANKSGIVING?! I’m lucky to have such a marvelous, caring wife. (She’s already volunteered to make my cheesecakes, and I’m pretty sure I can get her to agree to cocktail taste-testing, too!)

Fingers crossed that it’s nothing several mega-doses of Vitamin C and lots of hot tea and whatnot can’t fix. Let’s chat about this outfit, shall we? I don’t think y’all have this leather skirt from Zara yet, even though I’ve worn it out and about a handful of times since I got it eight whopping months ago. I just wore it out with thick black tights and a neon green collared shirt under a black crewneck sweater, in fact! This time I topped it with an H&M t-shirt and faux fur vest, a pair of Hue tights, and my Dolce Vita platform mules. It’s cold out, so I decided to layer leather on top of leather with my Elie Tahari jacket.

I piled on lots of bracelets and rings, mixed new and vintage necklaces, and grabbed a cheeky vintage bag. We took these on our drenched tennis courts, and I love the watery effect it brought to the photos, don’t you? XO!

We woke up to the wonderful sound of rain falling softly on the roof and down the gutters, the morning light grey and dim. It made us hit the snooze button three times, pretty sure it’s what caused us to eat dessert for breakfast, and why we decided to make a second batch of coffee around noon. It feels like Christmastime!

It’s not, of course, it’s Veteran’s Day and Remembrance Day and 11/11/11 and also the day which most closely resembles corduroy and probably I’ve left something out, but there you go.

I’m just hoping it eases up by tomorrow morning, because we’ve got a two-hour horseback ride situation in Half Moon Bay, M & I. We’re supposed to still show up if it’s just drizzling a little bit, and I’m kind of hoping it does because it sounds dreamy. M would wear her puffer vest and I’d wear one of my faux fur ones with my Ralph Lauren sweater and riding boots and…oh! I’m getting carried away.

A friend of mine noted that it was a perfect day for listening to The Cure’s Disintegration, so I did and it kicked off a little Cure-fest. It’s such a fantastic record, and after it ended I popped in my DVD of The Cure’s Greatest Hits videos. My favorites are Boys Don’t Cry, Lovecats and Cut Here. Some days nothing but The Cure will do!

I love this outfit, it’s all the dark browns and blues and different textures, I think. We’re still in that lovely phase of Fall where bare legs still work as long as one is reasonably bundled up elsewhere, tights optional. Also, this ponytail makes my hair look ridiculously long. It’s not that long, I just had it trimmed not long ago!

See my riding helmet? It’s too tight. I need another one for my big old noggin’, boo. The skirt is Ann Taylor and I adore it. It’s the perfect hue of navy and has a little sheen to the quilted texture, and it fits like a glove. The pussy bow blouse is vintage and a lovely dove grey, the same exact color of today’s sky! The wool blazer with elbow patches is from H&M L.O.G.G. and has the prettiest printed lining (pics below). It’s a colorful kind of paisley with birds situation, really cute.

Y’all know these shoes by now, my Linea Paolo mega-babes, and how serious is this darling little satchel from Asos?! I’m still in love with it. We mean business.

Smoky blue ring from Pretty Penny, rawr necklace from Mariele Ivy. My Remington and pretty Zoya nails in Lo, a warm medium pink with just a smidgen of coral. I hope y’all have super fun weekends planned, check back soon for a little loverbird action – we have matching Everlane tees to show off, whee!

How did things even work before Google calendar? I mean, I’ve used Moleskine diaries more or less for the past ten years but I cannot recall the act – outside of business – of consulting it for my personal or social life. I know I’ve documented things in them (kept most of them, actually – I’m a bit of a packrat when it comes to paper) – but I certainly have no memory of coming home on a Friday night and musing over my entries to see what I had committed to that weekend.

This is all to say that last night at ten to eight, whilst standing in line at Trader Joe’s after happy hour cocktails, my phone alerted me to the fact that we had a show to be at in ten minutes. I was shocked. I’d forgotten about it completely! How could I?! It was Wild Flag! I love Wild Flag.

Long story short, we ended up with tickets to their show tonight instead – we’re lucky they’re playing two nights. I probably would have breezed through the whole weekend without realizing it if it weren’t for Google calendar (and my Android phone).

Or maybe I should digress back into good old pen on paper, after all.

Now to the outfit at hand. Say hello again to my awesome bear tights from Latvian designers QooQoo. The cold is sticking for now, we’ve got rain predicted all weekend, and I’ve got firewood (and books) stacked and ready to go just as soon as it starts to rain. Between that, a kettle of Earl Grey and pumpkin muffins baking in the oven, it’s going to smell like heaven in here very soon.

SWEATER DRESSES ARE HERE TO STAY, HOORAY!

Slow-mo hair toss.

The dress is H&M and I’ve got another in a soft, peachy cream shade. I cinched in the waist with an Yves Saint Laurent obi belt in black suede, and popped on my cuffed and studded black suede ankle boots by Trouvé. The fur collars are vintage, and the big black Union Jack bag in leather is from Betsey Johnson.

Let’s talk about nail polish! I’ve been doing all kinds of super basic but really fun nail designs myself. This set is all Zoya polishes: Cynthia (smoky, blackened peacock teal) with Jinx (warm, coppery bronze) for the tips. I love the color combination. The (truly, truly, truly) outrageous feather earring is from Macy’s and came in a pair, but it’s best to wear just one at a time. I got the nudie friendship bracelet from a lovely gal at Indie Mart here in SF, the ring from Pretty Penny in Oakland, and that’s it!

Have a cozy weekend, y’all.

/FFAF

Howdy, folks. How was everybody’s weekend? Ours was bloody fantastic. A dear friend from Boston came to stay with us and it was non-stop fantastical shenanigans from the minute she arrived Friday night, catching up over hibiscus flower cocktails to our early evening tea and cookies send-off on Sunday. We visited several nearby beaches, accompanied her to get a new tattoo at the stunning Seventh Son tattoo shop in SOMA, moseyed around Half Moon Bay’s pumpkin patches and harvest festival, and enjoyed many delicious meals and stories and laughs. It was a blast!

Our Indian Summer persists, despite what these photos may be telling you. We’ve had a few crispy Fall days here and there, but for the most part our days still hover in the 70s. I was so excited to wear this outfit – a super light silk dress fortified with thick black tights, riding boots and a natty, no-nonsense coat and bag. You’ve seen this dress before, but on a warm Spring day with bare legs and platform mules, so it was fun to turn it into something that works for this time of year, too.

I wanted to show y’all our new front door. It’s such a deep, lacquered mahogany, I love it. We got to pick from around six colors – glossy jet black, red-orange, pale blue, brown and darker beige. Originally, I asked for black, but changed my mind when they told me of the hassle involved. We’ve since decorated the house inside and out for Halloween – a wee bale of hay, lots of pumpkins, oversized pieces of candy corn and vampires and ghosts! I’ll try and get some photos up here soon. So festive!

Dress: Julie Brown
Coat: H&M
Boots: Etienne Aigner
Contrast Satchel: Asos
Foxtail: Dollywood

Necklace: Mariele Ivy
Thorned Cuff: Made Her Think
Earrings: Asos
Fox Ring: Asos / Smokey Ring: Pretty Penny, vintage

Typical day wandering around the forest drinking Blanton’s and pouncing on tree stumps. It’s a gloomy, rainy Fall day here at home, which is very lovely – the rain sounds divine – but the downside is that it means yet another canceled riding lesson. I haven’t been riding in two weeks, and it was something like 80°F then. My instructor just texted to tell me that my pony is lame, to boot.

Did y’all have a nice weekend? Ours was awesome. We had dinner at MUA in Oakland with an out-of-town friend who was interviewing for an exciting new position nearby, and the evening weather was gorgeous, the streets packed to the gills with Art Murmur-goers. The tomboy called the shots on Saturday, so we stayed in our PJs, slept in, watched movies and lazed around all the day long. Yesterday I got to call the shots, so we brunched in the Mission and soaked in the blues skies at IndieMart in Potrero Hill, petite in tow.

M found us some DIY mimosa kits (paper lunch sacks containing a bottle of OJ, a can of Sofia, and a plastic cup) and Korean tacos, and I scored some lovely finds – a vintage sweater with a tribal Pendleton feel, a nudie girl friendship bracelet, and a friendly, soft-skin making solid lotion bar.

Later that night I got all dressed up to meet a friend on the Embarcadero, where we attended a Fleet Week formal reception aboard the HMCS Ottawa at Pier 35. It was so much fun! The Snowbirds (officially known as the Canadian Forces 431 Air Demonstration Squadron) were all there and as they are basically rock stars, or the Canadian versions of our Blue Angels, it was so cool to hang out on the same awesome WWII destroyer ship as them. After my date – an officious member of the Canadian Consulate – and I got our sea legs over cocktails, we eventually scampered up and down four levels of the ship on an excellent tour, which ended in an invitation to sit down and have a beer (Canadian!) in the Ward Room. There may or may not have also been Canadian hip-hop playing.

OK, let’s discuss this outfit. I really like this dress and both times I’ve worn it so far, it’s gotten lots of compliments. People can’t believe it’s not vintage when I tell them. I feel like it’s really versatile – can be dressed up or down, worn in mild or cold weather – and features a print that’s somehow both attention-getting and soft, muted.

Dress & Pony Watch: Asos
Belt: Vintage
Shoes: Seychelles (so comfortable, you guys)
Necklaces: Culp Baubles (lipstick bullet), Mariele Ivy (bear tooth)
Bracelets: Lori’s Shoes (leather + gold cuff), H&M (braided friendship bracelet)
Ring: Crossroads
Clutch: Handmade by this smart, foxy lady

What’s it like where you are? I know it snowed in Utah, finally stormed in Austin, and that Boston saw a little Indian Summer of its own this weekend. All the weather-y things.

XOXO,

FFAF

Hi! I don’t know about you guys, but the first thing I think about when I see beautiful sand dunes oceanside and I’m not wearing any pants is FOOTBALL. Kidding. I’m wearing shorts. They’re just so short you can’t see them here. Also, it’s obvious I don’t know the first thing about how to throw a football, even after watching the entire show Friday Night Lights in less than two weeks this summer.

Maybe next year when we move to Boston and it’s time for Fancy Pants’ football practice I can, you know, observe. They won’t mind. Right, Fancy? POWER GRAB!

But seriously, welcome to Dillon Beach. Isn’t it pretty? The tomboy found this sweet little coastal town when she read that the Russian River had gross toxic algae levels and she was forced to look at other places nearby. Thank heavens, because Dillon Beach is perfect. With one general store (adorable little restaurant attached), beach house rentals galore, and a super dog-friendly population of only 283, it was a dream!

My amazing, gauzy white shirt is from the Sports Basement. SPORTS BASEMENT. Some things you should know about Sports Basement:

1. All the lesbians are always at this store. Hot.
2. They’re only in the Bay Area, but you can buy from them online.
3. It’s totally not your regular sport-o store; they’re very community and very “Bay Area”*.
   *Please see Julie Goldman’s little deal on the Bay Area. 3:15. Here. You’re welcome!

Anyway, I bought a shirt from the sport-o place. I even wore it to Mango once, tucked into a leather panel miniskirt and hot little studded ankle boots. It’s not the kind of thing I own, but it’s Hurley (apparently that’s a thing, like a ski thing?) and gauzy, and to be frank I don’t see a damn sporty thing about it. Not that there’s anything wrong with sporty femmes. Rock it, sporty femmes! Own it. Work it. Werq. You do you, etc. I’m just not one of you.

(Skiing, tennis and horseback riding don’t count. Oh, and that one time I went surfing. Um.)

That Bird! He and I frolicked in the Pacific Ocean for hours and hours. He’s inexhaustible, and will leap fearlessly into the waves to fetch a stick or a ball. A real dog’s dog, he is, when he’s not terrified. I guess that’s why we love it so when he jumps into the water – for once, he’s so brave! Plus, he looks super funny all soaking wet. Like a skinny rat mop.

Wondering where the dingo is? Muzzled like a champ, tethered to a responsible human being somewhere nearby, and trembling with the urge to destroy all the other off-leash dogs and small children running by, kicking sand in his face. Bless it.

The striped suit is vintage, I picked it up off a sale rack in Cocoa Beach, FL earlier this summer. The shorts are Free People. The shiny perfect red nail polish on both fingers and toes is Jeffrey Campbell’s “No You Din’t”. I’m also wearing my Three Sisters “femme” necklace and awesome rhodium “bamboo” hoop earrings by Lauren Adams. M saw these lobster print beach mats and had to have them – the built-in pillows are such a bonus.

God, September just flew by, don’t you think? I hope October cools down, and stays awhile.