fitforafemme.com

Is it seriously May already? I’ve been busy getting an exciting event off the ground with Miss Rep, buried under real estate – we fought and won our first bidding war ever just yesterday - and of course dealing with the things that come with wrapping up a school year for the petite and trying to get started packing for a move that’s bearing down on us like a freight train.

These photos are actually from March 31st, plus my hair’s been cut for two weeks and it’s kind of funny to post these – there’s just one more in the queue before we get to the new style – I barely recognize myself! When my hairstylist stepped back to check out her work, she put her hands on her hips and exclaimed, “I can’t even IMAGINE you with long hair anymore! It’s crazy!” and it is, a little bit. All the light and painted bits have been hacked away for the most part.

These printed jeans were one of those “I’m not sure about this, but I’m doing it anyway” Target purchases (I know you know what I’m talking about). Since then I’ve gotten two black Everlane belt (hush) and no longer have to steal the tomboy’s belt for my tomboy femme outfits. I certainly have seen snazzier, still affordable pairs of animal print skinnies at Zara, but oh my god are these soft. Like pajama soft. Basically, these pants = my sweats. Just thinking about them makes me feel snuggly and cozy. That’s the real reason I’ve held onto them!

I cannot for the life of me remember what brand this camp shirt is, but I got it Sports Basement I think. I have a similar gauzy white one as well and they’re fantastic because they’re loose and slouchy but unfussy, breathable cotton. Sometimes it’s nice not to fuss over silks! Pairing it all with the tough suede ankle boots (Trouvé) and my Cynthia Rowley bag were easy choices, and so were the Asos earrings and my leathery Mariele Ivy necklace. I added chunky rings and a silly leather cuff with a bullet on it that I got in Portland two years ago, and that’s about it. Hope you liked it!

Now please tell me all of your outstanding weekend plans – Cinco de Mayo, Derby Day – because I’ve got nil. The tomboy is in Boston (it’s her turn – apparently, we’re taking them now) and has a derby party to go to with friends and I’m green with jealousy (though I won’t envy her marching off to a parade of open houses come Sunday). They’ve been infusing bourbon with mint! So fancy! Another friend of mine has pledged to reveal a DIY derby hat so fantastical that we’re all going to fall over in awe, and I can’t wait to see what she and her crafty little hands have done this time.

I’m just hoping I can take a break from the 300 pages I have to read for a Sunday book club brunch to see that big old super moon rise over the Oakland hills!

XOXO,

FFAF

Despite today’s coast-to-coast temps that felt a lot more Summer than Spring, one-and-a-half weeks ago I woke up to a rather chilly day in Boston – hence the cozy black sweater dress (H&M), snuggly moss green tights (H&M), and tough girl leather jacket (Zara). Isn’t this room lovely?

Our friends recently painted up their warm, roomy rowhouse, and the accent wall you see is a super versatile rosy brown that changes hue with the day’s light, looking plummy at dusk, or like melted chocolate in the morning. It was so inspiring for thinking of how to fill up the blank walls at our soon-to-be new home in New England. So many ways to play with color, and we want to experiment with them all: paint, wallpaper, re-staining the wood floors, whitewashing cabinets, etc.

I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THIS NEW LEATHER JACKET FROM ZARA.

I cannot tell you how many months I’ve been searching for it. At least a year, probably longer. I picked a vintage motorcycle jacket up at Afterlife in the Mission last April, but the shoulders were too broad and overpowered my frame, so I let it go in a clothing swap (after wasting months telling myself I’d take it to be altered somewhere – ha!).

I wanted something and true to the motorcycle jacket look – the heavy, wide lapels, a narrow collar, all the zippers and snaps and especially the built-in belts that could be left hanging loosely or snapped tight – but at the same time I wanted it to be fitted, as if it had been tailored just for me, and of course I wanted it to be gloriously soft, supple leather.

I kept bemoaning the insanely expensive jackets I loved at Reiss and AllSaints, pouting at the so-so offerings from Topshop and Asos, telling myself it wouldn’t  be that bad if I settled.

But then! Wandering around Newbury Street on my birthday, we couldn’t ignore the siren call of their lovely Zara store and walked in to have a peek. It’s the last place I’d expect to find exactly the leather motorcycle I desired, but there I spotted it, tried it on, and it was a match made in heaven. I was totally in love, but then came that decisive moment – I checked the leather: lambskin (phew) and then the price tag – not exactly a steal, but not highway robbery, either. Oh dear.

There was a bit of handwringing on my part, but because it was my birthday the tomboy very sweetly and lovingly and happily insisted on treating me, and who was I to resist? I couldn’t possibly. It was perfect! (Did I say it was perfect?)

Anyway, if I had to pick an article of clothing as my spirit animal, this would be it, and if any unauthorized persons come anywhere near it, PLEASE BE ADVISED THAT I CARRY A BLADE. It’s very sharp.

Let’s chat about some of the other accessories happening with this outfit – serious riding boots (Etienne Aigner), an earthy necklace (Mariele Ivy), a friendship bracelet from IndieMart and vintage ring complement a simple but thoughtful cold-weather look. Hope you enjoyed it! I’ve actually got quite a few posts in the queue, so they should be coming along a bit more regularly now that I’m back home. I have a new haircut to debut as well!

Cheers,

FFAF

Here it is, folks, the first official FFAF post of the year!

Picking out the first outfit of the year was a challenge – I felt like it had to be special, but at the same time the tomboy and I wanted to get ready in a jiffy for an afternoon playing around in San Francisco and at the beach (after a deliciously long morning in bed). Luckily, we spoiled Californians had lovely weather. All of these photos were taken at the Pacifica Pier, a quarter-mile long pier jutting out into the Pacific Ocean from the tiny coastal town of Pacifica, which is about a five-minute drive from our house.

Blue skies, just a hint of chill in the air, and a bit of haze around the edges to soften things up a bit. (I’m sure the hungover masses appreciated that last merciful touch.) If it’d been a touch cooler, I would have layered my lime green blouse under the sweater – how cute the pointed collar would have been against the black! Alas, t-shirt weather.

Even though in my world this is a pretty un-fussy, low-key outfit, I sure got some looks from the anglers on the pier in Pacifica! Good thing these tights are nearly as thick as pants, what with all the wind blowing around. I could never wear this skirt without super thick leggings underneath – in addition to being terribly sweet it’s also obscenely short.

Sometimes I see other style bloggers bare-legged in skirts this short (sometimes shorter still) and my mind is thoroughly blown. What about wind? What about sitting down? What if – God forbid – you drop your bloody lens cap? Are they outfits for blog purposes only and not IRL? If not, what’s their secret and must it exclude modesty? I NEED TO KNOW.

Daytime snuggles on the beach are kind of the best snuggles, no? I don’t ever do my hair this way, but I kind of love it, especially after seeing the pics. This is second day hair, teased a whole bunch at the crown with the top third or so pulled back and pinned into place, with a spritz or two of trusty Elnett to keep it all secure. I just used some shine serum on my brushed curls and heavy bangs (they’re growing out so quickly), and that’s it! Of course the sea breeze whipped things up, but it appears to be for the better.

I’m gonna talk about my nails, and then let y’all look at the rest of the pictures sans interruption. I saw an online tutorial for ombre nails, yes, just like the clothes or hair, but for nails. It was metallic and blue, but I wanted to do a girly pinkish gold version for NYE, so I picked out four colors (yes, four) and went to work. I layered a muted brown (Zoya Dea) over a pinkish nude (Who Comes Up with These Names? from OPI) over a creamy pink (Zoya Lo), and then blended it all together with a glittery layer of Butter London’s Tart with a Heart. Success!

Details

Skirt: Zara
Sweater: Target
Leggings: Silence + Noise
Studded Suede Ankle Boots: Trouvé
Patent Leather Clutch: Alice + Olivia for Payless

Silver Cuff Bracelet & Ring: BCBG
Silver Thorned Bangle: Made Her Think
Rhodium “bamboo” hoop earrings: Lauren Adams
Watch: Citizen

It seems we’ve all gone headfirst into December, with brash winds and orphan sunshine. Poor M’s been locked in a brutal two-day offsite brainstorming session for work the past few days, and is so sleepy she can’t even drink bourbon. It’s shocking, I know. Anyway, here she is standing in front of some sort of houseboat in a state of disrepair, in Sausalito. There are all sorts of boat lifts and such on either side of her, and despite the abandoned cooler in the front left, there wasn’t a soul around!

Boat, boat, we’re on a boat! This is pulling into Tiburon, on the ferry, of course. I love how it looks like she’s manning the corner/door, like she’s keeping watch almost. Side note: Did you know that watchcaps haven’t got anything to do with watches? I didn’t. I had to be told. I thought perhaps watches got so cold in extreme weather that there are wee tiny knit hats to keep them safe from the elements. Adorable, but WRONG.

This is the amazing, $300 Newkirk Down Vest she scored for $99 not long ago, by Polo Ralph Lauren. It’s pretty amazing, especially considering we’d been scouring the interwebs for puffers for weeks and she kept vetoing most of them as not awesome enough (even those with wildly outrageous price tags). She thinks this one is perfect, and now she’s got two and is satisfied – I think.

I like these photos so much, M all smashed up against the window (you can see how cold it is) and peering out with that dreamy, childlike curiosity. We saw all sorts of wildlife in the water that day – harbor porpoises who’ve been hanging out in the bay this time of year for the past few years (biologists are researching why, it’s fascinating), enormous pelicans dive-bombing for food, and sea lions. While the porpoises were super cool, my favorite, hands-down, are the pelicans. They’re so kamikaze! And clumsy! And the splash they make and the angle at which they plummet into the water, it’s a sight to behold.

This is where the very unsuccessful, wee crab-catching occurred. Hooray!

Corduroys: Kenneth Cole
Shirt: Izod
Sweater: Zara
Puffer: Polo Ralph Lauren
Boots: Mark Nason
Gloves:  H&M
Glasses: Dior Homme

Look how happy we are! We ought to live on a boat, like Conor says. (I love this song, I’d sing it over and over at the top of my lungs to and from my riding lessons all summer. Such a good album.)

We should move to Sausalito
Living’s easy on a houseboat
Let the ocean rock us back and forth to sleep

In the morning with the sunrise
Look in the water see the blue sky
As if heaven has been laid there at our feet

I’m sitting here writing up this old blog post and M is playing Red Dead Redemption, which has raised my eyebrow in a disapproving manner on more than one occasion, I’ll have you know. She is determined to beat one more game before the end of year, given the fact that she’ll have had her PS3 for six months and will only have beaten one measly game (with MY help, thank you very much also WE MISS YOU LOST PLANET II). Too bad all the tomboys who’d play with her live in such far-flung places as SLC and Boston.

Did I not tell you that this scarf matches my dress in a borderline creepy way? In case you missed it from my other post, her mama knitted all three of us a beautiful scarf, just because. The petite’s was bright red, mine was chartreuse, and this is M’s! I have the feeling we’ll all be playing musical scarves this winter. They’re all fabulous. I lucked out because Grandma Medina also knitted me a lovely burnt orange scarf as well, also chenille. Hooray!

I never would have pegged M to pluck a GOLDENROD wool sweater off the rack at H&M, but she sure did, and it ended up being absolutely perfect with this vintage Salvatore Ferragamo tie, with the little lions and regal bugles. She paired them with an Elie Tahari dress shirt, Zara slacks and her trusty Asos brogues. (The belt is also from H&M.)

We hope y’all liked these Turkey Day photos as much as we do, and that your leftovers lasted longer than ours did (they were all gone by Sunday). I am swinging by my little brother’s office tomorrow to drop off his phone – silly fool left it in my car on the way home Thursday night – and one of our pumpkin cheesecakes, because we do NOT need to eat all three by ourselves. In other news, I was tickled pink to find the latest issue of Horse Illustrated (I didn’t even know such a thing existed) in my mailbox, an early Christmas gift from my folks! So sweet!

I also think I’ve settled on some nice DIY gifts for folks come Christmastime: Grandma Jones’s fresh-baked shortbread, and homemade bourbon caramel sauce and spiced pear-infused vodka. One year the petite and I also made our own wrapping paper, with some rad shaped sponges, beautiful paints, plain brown wrapping paper – and glitter, of course! I’d love to do that again, too. Do you guys ever do homemade or DIY presents? I wanna hear all about ‘em!

Here’s a few more of the two of us goofin’ around:

First things first, today is the 13th annual International Transgender Day of Remembrance, so perhaps take just a moment to honor those no longer with us, support those we’re lucky enough to have in our lives today, and keep fighting transphobia. Amos Mac, of Original Plumbing and Translady Fanzine fame, wrote this touching piece about Gwen Araujo, and our friends at Autostraddle have a wonderful open thread going, and I really recommend checking out both!

Gwen was a 17-year-old local who was murdered in 2002 by four young men in a brutal hate crime, and hers was the first memorial of its kind that I’d ever attended. I remember it being very somber and despondent, and frighteningly unfamiliar (I was so sheltered then, still very much a baby dyke). However, it was also softly and sadly determined, for while a vivacious, courageous transgender teen was gone and would be deeply mourned by many, the community’s response was deafening: Gwen’s life would be remembered and celebrated with a strength that wouldn’t stop until it drowned out the ignorance and hatred that took it away.

Throughout all of this, a high school in Gwen’s town was putting on a production of The Laramie Project, and so an already badly shaken student body and faculty found themselves facing a different type of incomprehensible hate: Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist psychopaths.

I hardly remember how it happened or who I was with, but one night I found myself among the protective circle of Angel Action folks standing outside of the entrance Newark Memorial High School, wearing those big fluffy angel wings in the cold, all of us doing our best to shield the performers and audience members from those rotten sons of bitches. It was a really small, very tiny thing, but doing anything felt better than doing nothing in the wake of a tragedy like that.

(PS. I’m donating 25% of all sales this week to the Transgender Law Center, so go take a peek at my Etsy shop, Loverbirds, and shop for change…social change! Or go and buy an awesome t-shirt from Revel & Riot – a portion of all proceeds go to LGBTQ rights and equality groups, and they’ll make excellent stocking stuffers.)

In other news, it appears I’m getting sick. This is horrific timing, as I have two elaborate desserts to make for Thanksgiving, and a bit of tinkering yet to do for our signature Turkey Day cocktails! We’re also preparing for lots and lots of house guests, and I just haven’t got the time to be sick! DID I MENTION IT’S THANKSGIVING?! I’m lucky to have such a marvelous, caring wife. (She’s already volunteered to make my cheesecakes, and I’m pretty sure I can get her to agree to cocktail taste-testing, too!)

Fingers crossed that it’s nothing several mega-doses of Vitamin C and lots of hot tea and whatnot can’t fix. Let’s chat about this outfit, shall we? I don’t think y’all have this leather skirt from Zara yet, even though I’ve worn it out and about a handful of times since I got it eight whopping months ago. I just wore it out with thick black tights and a neon green collared shirt under a black crewneck sweater, in fact! This time I topped it with an H&M t-shirt and faux fur vest, a pair of Hue tights, and my Dolce Vita platform mules. It’s cold out, so I decided to layer leather on top of leather with my Elie Tahari jacket.

I piled on lots of bracelets and rings, mixed new and vintage necklaces, and grabbed a cheeky vintage bag. We took these on our drenched tennis courts, and I love the watery effect it brought to the photos, don’t you? XO!

Since our tour of the UK and Ireland was organized solely around booze (London Dry gin, scotch and Jameson/Guinness), it’s only fitting that we return to the original theme here. Our new friends agreed to come along with us to tour the Old Jameson Distillery in Dublin, just over the Liffey from where we were staying, on our last day in Ireland.

We showed up and kind of just marveled at the slick old-meets-new feel of the place. Located in Smithfield at the Bow Street Distillery since 1780, you walk through the front and are faced with an enormous historical copper pot still, but enter the museum and visitor’s center where it’s all gorgeous exposed beams and brick, very open and spacious, with a massive bar in the corner and see-through glass floors – which give a unique glimpse into the belly of the distillery beast beneath your feet!

Even though actual production now takes place in Midleton Distillery in Cork, the original Dublin distillery has been painstakingly restored to give folks a look at what it was like when Bow Street was an operating distillery, pumping out an impressive one million gallons of whiskey annually at the turn of the 19th century.

Fun fact: Vatting (or blending) still happens in Dublin!

We bought our tickets and went upstairs to the restaurant for a quick nibble and some refreshment, and next thing we knew it was our turn! The tour begins in a little theater, where you get a bit of history about Mr. Jameson  and whiskey in general, and how it differs from other varieties around the world. It’s here where the guide selects a lucky few for a special post-tour tasting, and guess who was picked in our group? Of course (and absolutely as it should be), it was M!

An awesome start.

After the short film, we were guided through a series of fascinating rooms depicting scenes from the seven stages of whiskey making, from malting to milling and maturation. Many featured hands-on pieces from the old distillery, others adorably staged miniatures of what it once looked like, with tiny workers and menacing cats lurking in corners and everything!

It was a great tour that moved at a nice, brisk pace, and it felt just as appropriate and entertaining for newcomers to whiskey as to aficionados. We definitely recommend it. Can’t wait to return to Ireland to visit the one in Cork…

I’m wearing a dress from Zara with an H&M belt and my vintage brogues. M’s wearing H&M shorts with a vintage cardigan layered over a plain white dress shirt and a striped cotton t-shirt also from H&M, and her Aldo shoes. Can you spot the pin on her cardigan? This quirky older gentleman at a vintage shop made them – they’re wee figurines of football (soccer) players, and as soon as she saw them she had to have one!