Here it is, folks, the first official FFAF post of the year!

Picking out the first outfit of the year was a challenge – I felt like it had to be special, but at the same time the tomboy and I wanted to get ready in a jiffy for an afternoon playing around in San Francisco and at the beach (after a deliciously long morning in bed). Luckily, we spoiled Californians had lovely weather. All of these photos were taken at the Pacifica Pier, a quarter-mile long pier jutting out into the Pacific Ocean from the tiny coastal town of Pacifica, which is about a five-minute drive from our house.

Blue skies, just a hint of chill in the air, and a bit of haze around the edges to soften things up a bit. (I’m sure the hungover masses appreciated that last merciful touch.) If it’d been a touch cooler, I would have layered my lime green blouse under the sweater – how cute the pointed collar would have been against the black! Alas, t-shirt weather.

Even though in my world this is a pretty un-fussy, low-key outfit, I sure got some looks from the anglers on the pier in Pacifica! Good thing these tights are nearly as thick as pants, what with all the wind blowing around. I could never wear this skirt without super thick leggings underneath – in addition to being terribly sweet it’s also obscenely short.

Sometimes I see other style bloggers bare-legged in skirts this short (sometimes shorter still) and my mind is thoroughly blown. What about wind? What about sitting down? What if – God forbid – you drop your bloody lens cap? Are they outfits for blog purposes only and not IRL? If not, what’s their secret and must it exclude modesty? I NEED TO KNOW.

Daytime snuggles on the beach are kind of the best snuggles, no? I don’t ever do my hair this way, but I kind of love it, especially after seeing the pics. This is second day hair, teased a whole bunch at the crown with the top third or so pulled back and pinned into place, with a spritz or two of trusty Elnett to keep it all secure. I just used some shine serum on my brushed curls and heavy bangs (they’re growing out so quickly), and that’s it! Of course the sea breeze whipped things up, but it appears to be for the better.

I’m gonna talk about my nails, and then let y’all look at the rest of the pictures sans interruption. I saw an online tutorial for ombre nails, yes, just like the clothes or hair, but for nails. It was metallic and blue, but I wanted to do a girly pinkish gold version for NYE, so I picked out four colors (yes, four) and went to work. I layered a muted brown (Zoya Dea) over a pinkish nude (Who Comes Up with These Names? from OPI) over a creamy pink (Zoya Lo), and then blended it all together with a glittery layer of Butter London’s Tart with a Heart. Success!

Details

Skirt: Zara
Sweater: Target
Leggings: Silence + Noise
Studded Suede Ankle Boots: Trouvé
Patent Leather Clutch: Alice + Olivia for Payless

Silver Cuff Bracelet & Ring: BCBG
Silver Thorned Bangle: Made Her Think
Rhodium “bamboo” hoop earrings: Lauren Adams
Watch: Citizen

It seems we’ve all gone headfirst into December, with brash winds and orphan sunshine. Poor M’s been locked in a brutal two-day offsite brainstorming session for work the past few days, and is so sleepy she can’t even drink bourbon. It’s shocking, I know. Anyway, here she is standing in front of some sort of houseboat in a state of disrepair, in Sausalito. There are all sorts of boat lifts and such on either side of her, and despite the abandoned cooler in the front left, there wasn’t a soul around!

Boat, boat, we’re on a boat! This is pulling into Tiburon, on the ferry, of course. I love how it looks like she’s manning the corner/door, like she’s keeping watch almost. Side note: Did you know that watchcaps haven’t got anything to do with watches? I didn’t. I had to be told. I thought perhaps watches got so cold in extreme weather that there are wee tiny knit hats to keep them safe from the elements. Adorable, but WRONG.

This is the amazing, $300 Newkirk Down Vest she scored for $99 not long ago, by Polo Ralph Lauren. It’s pretty amazing, especially considering we’d been scouring the interwebs for puffers for weeks and she kept vetoing most of them as not awesome enough (even those with wildly outrageous price tags). She thinks this one is perfect, and now she’s got two and is satisfied – I think.

I like these photos so much, M all smashed up against the window (you can see how cold it is) and peering out with that dreamy, childlike curiosity. We saw all sorts of wildlife in the water that day – harbor porpoises who’ve been hanging out in the bay this time of year for the past few years (biologists are researching why, it’s fascinating), enormous pelicans dive-bombing for food, and sea lions. While the porpoises were super cool, my favorite, hands-down, are the pelicans. They’re so kamikaze! And clumsy! And the splash they make and the angle at which they plummet into the water, it’s a sight to behold.

This is where the very unsuccessful, wee crab-catching occurred. Hooray!

Corduroys: Kenneth Cole
Shirt: Izod
Sweater: Zara
Puffer: Polo Ralph Lauren
Boots: Mark Nason
Gloves:  H&M
Glasses: Dior Homme

Look how happy we are! We ought to live on a boat, like Conor says. (I love this song, I’d sing it over and over at the top of my lungs to and from my riding lessons all summer. Such a good album.)

We should move to Sausalito
Living’s easy on a houseboat
Let the ocean rock us back and forth to sleep

In the morning with the sunrise
Look in the water see the blue sky
As if heaven has been laid there at our feet

I’m sitting here writing up this old blog post and M is playing Red Dead Redemption, which has raised my eyebrow in a disapproving manner on more than one occasion, I’ll have you know. She is determined to beat one more game before the end of year, given the fact that she’ll have had her PS3 for six months and will only have beaten one measly game (with MY help, thank you very much also WE MISS YOU LOST PLANET II). Too bad all the tomboys who’d play with her live in such far-flung places as SLC and Boston.

Did I not tell you that this scarf matches my dress in a borderline creepy way? In case you missed it from my other post, her mama knitted all three of us a beautiful scarf, just because. The petite’s was bright red, mine was chartreuse, and this is M’s! I have the feeling we’ll all be playing musical scarves this winter. They’re all fabulous. I lucked out because Grandma Medina also knitted me a lovely burnt orange scarf as well, also chenille. Hooray!

I never would have pegged M to pluck a GOLDENROD wool sweater off the rack at H&M, but she sure did, and it ended up being absolutely perfect with this vintage Salvatore Ferragamo tie, with the little lions and regal bugles. She paired them with an Elie Tahari dress shirt, Zara slacks and her trusty Asos brogues. (The belt is also from H&M.)

We hope y’all liked these Turkey Day photos as much as we do, and that your leftovers lasted longer than ours did (they were all gone by Sunday). I am swinging by my little brother’s office tomorrow to drop off his phone – silly fool left it in my car on the way home Thursday night – and one of our pumpkin cheesecakes, because we do NOT need to eat all three by ourselves. In other news, I was tickled pink to find the latest issue of Horse Illustrated (I didn’t even know such a thing existed) in my mailbox, an early Christmas gift from my folks! So sweet!

I also think I’ve settled on some nice DIY gifts for folks come Christmastime: Grandma Jones’s fresh-baked shortbread, and homemade bourbon caramel sauce and spiced pear-infused vodka. One year the petite and I also made our own wrapping paper, with some rad shaped sponges, beautiful paints, plain brown wrapping paper – and glitter, of course! I’d love to do that again, too. Do you guys ever do homemade or DIY presents? I wanna hear all about ‘em!

Here’s a few more of the two of us goofin’ around:

First things first, today is the 13th annual International Transgender Day of Remembrance, so perhaps take just a moment to honor those no longer with us, support those we’re lucky enough to have in our lives today, and keep fighting transphobia. Amos Mac, of Original Plumbing and Translady Fanzine fame, wrote this touching piece about Gwen Araujo, and our friends at Autostraddle have a wonderful open thread going, and I really recommend checking out both!

Gwen was a 17-year-old local who was murdered in 2002 by four young men in a brutal hate crime, and hers was the first memorial of its kind that I’d ever attended. I remember it being very somber and despondent, and frighteningly unfamiliar (I was so sheltered then, still very much a baby dyke). However, it was also softly and sadly determined, for while a vivacious, courageous transgender teen was gone and would be deeply mourned by many, the community’s response was deafening: Gwen’s life would be remembered and celebrated with a strength that wouldn’t stop until it drowned out the ignorance and hatred that took it away.

Throughout all of this, a high school in Gwen’s town was putting on a production of The Laramie Project, and so an already badly shaken student body and faculty found themselves facing a different type of incomprehensible hate: Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist psychopaths.

I hardly remember how it happened or who I was with, but one night I found myself among the protective circle of Angel Action folks standing outside of the entrance Newark Memorial High School, wearing those big fluffy angel wings in the cold, all of us doing our best to shield the performers and audience members from those rotten sons of bitches. It was a really small, very tiny thing, but doing anything felt better than doing nothing in the wake of a tragedy like that.

(PS. I’m donating 25% of all sales this week to the Transgender Law Center, so go take a peek at my Etsy shop, Loverbirds, and shop for change…social change! Or go and buy an awesome t-shirt from Revel & Riot – a portion of all proceeds go to LGBTQ rights and equality groups, and they’ll make excellent stocking stuffers.)

In other news, it appears I’m getting sick. This is horrific timing, as I have two elaborate desserts to make for Thanksgiving, and a bit of tinkering yet to do for our signature Turkey Day cocktails! We’re also preparing for lots and lots of house guests, and I just haven’t got the time to be sick! DID I MENTION IT’S THANKSGIVING?! I’m lucky to have such a marvelous, caring wife. (She’s already volunteered to make my cheesecakes, and I’m pretty sure I can get her to agree to cocktail taste-testing, too!)

Fingers crossed that it’s nothing several mega-doses of Vitamin C and lots of hot tea and whatnot can’t fix. Let’s chat about this outfit, shall we? I don’t think y’all have this leather skirt from Zara yet, even though I’ve worn it out and about a handful of times since I got it eight whopping months ago. I just wore it out with thick black tights and a neon green collared shirt under a black crewneck sweater, in fact! This time I topped it with an H&M t-shirt and faux fur vest, a pair of Hue tights, and my Dolce Vita platform mules. It’s cold out, so I decided to layer leather on top of leather with my Elie Tahari jacket.

I piled on lots of bracelets and rings, mixed new and vintage necklaces, and grabbed a cheeky vintage bag. We took these on our drenched tennis courts, and I love the watery effect it brought to the photos, don’t you? XO!

Since our tour of the UK and Ireland was organized solely around booze (London Dry gin, scotch and Jameson/Guinness), it’s only fitting that we return to the original theme here. Our new friends agreed to come along with us to tour the Old Jameson Distillery in Dublin, just over the Liffey from where we were staying, on our last day in Ireland.

We showed up and kind of just marveled at the slick old-meets-new feel of the place. Located in Smithfield at the Bow Street Distillery since 1780, you walk through the front and are faced with an enormous historical copper pot still, but enter the museum and visitor’s center where it’s all gorgeous exposed beams and brick, very open and spacious, with a massive bar in the corner and see-through glass floors – which give a unique glimpse into the belly of the distillery beast beneath your feet!

Even though actual production now takes place in Midleton Distillery in Cork, the original Dublin distillery has been painstakingly restored to give folks a look at what it was like when Bow Street was an operating distillery, pumping out an impressive one million gallons of whiskey annually at the turn of the 19th century.

Fun fact: Vatting (or blending) still happens in Dublin!

We bought our tickets and went upstairs to the restaurant for a quick nibble and some refreshment, and next thing we knew it was our turn! The tour begins in a little theater, where you get a bit of history about Mr. Jameson  and whiskey in general, and how it differs from other varieties around the world. It’s here where the guide selects a lucky few for a special post-tour tasting, and guess who was picked in our group? Of course (and absolutely as it should be), it was M!

An awesome start.

After the short film, we were guided through a series of fascinating rooms depicting scenes from the seven stages of whiskey making, from malting to milling and maturation. Many featured hands-on pieces from the old distillery, others adorably staged miniatures of what it once looked like, with tiny workers and menacing cats lurking in corners and everything!

It was a great tour that moved at a nice, brisk pace, and it felt just as appropriate and entertaining for newcomers to whiskey as to aficionados. We definitely recommend it. Can’t wait to return to Ireland to visit the one in Cork…

I’m wearing a dress from Zara with an H&M belt and my vintage brogues. M’s wearing H&M shorts with a vintage cardigan layered over a plain white dress shirt and a striped cotton t-shirt also from H&M, and her Aldo shoes. Can you spot the pin on her cardigan? This quirky older gentleman at a vintage shop made them – they’re wee figurines of football (soccer) players, and as soon as she saw them she had to have one!

Wrapping up Edinburgh with a tour of – what else? – the famed castle. It was really magical. We spent hours just wandering around, soaking up the incredible history and completely foreign architecture. In addition to housing the Scottish National War Memorial (that was probably our very favorite part) and National War Museum of Scotland, it also contains Edinburgh’s oldest surviving building, early 12th century St. Margaret’s Chapel.

Fun with cannons! Contrary to how it may look, we were there on a fairly crowded day! For the most part it wasn’t bad at all, but in some popular attractions, like the Stone of Destiny and Honours of Scotland, the lines got long and moved slowly. All to glimpse the crown jewels, sceptre and sword, which date back to the 1400s and 1500s, and the stone upon which Macbeth’s stepson sat when he was proclaimed King of Scots in 1057! Definitely worth it. The reason you’re not seeing more photos of that sort of thing is because often photography was prohibited (not that that stopped some tourists, which horrified us!).

Some well-behaved interior shots. I wanted to take a break and thank y’all, from the very bottom of my heart, for all of your kind, supportive, infinitely wise advice for Violet. You’re truly amazing!

It’s not Buckingham, but even the Edinburgh Castle has a changing of the guards! It’s a lot more low key and folks just kind of cluster around to look on and it’s very officious and whatnot.

It wouldn’t be fair to leave Scotland with at least a few of these silly tourist shots, would it? Nah. I’m not sure what you call these little holes in the castle walls for looking or shooting or dumping things through, but M squished herself into one. It was a long way down! Let’s all be glad she didn’t fall out. (The flask was in her pocket.) KIDDING, KIDDOS. I’m just kidding.

I poked my little head through one at M’s insistence, and she stuck hers through one to take that picture up there. Cheeky! I don’t know if it even needs mentioning, but I will say whether we were strolling around hand-in-hand in the castle, down the streets, or nuzzling in bars or restaurants, nobody batted an eye at the affectionate lesbian couple. We didn’t expect anyone to, but it’s always nice to know that’s the case in practice. In case anyone was wondering.

Some lovely scenic shots of Edinburgh’s Old and New Towns, as well as the Firth of Forth out there in the distance. And below, some more goofy, silly parting shots. Hope you enjoyed them!

For the record, I’m wearing my vintage shoes with Asos trousers, a ruffled tank from H&M, and a French Connection for SEARS jacket. The sparkly necklace is from Banana Republic.  The tomboy’s wearing a vintage cardigan with Zara trousers and Aldo shoes, and her Dior Homme eyeglasses.

That’s it, then! Off to Dublin next!

Cheers,

FFAF

I’ll just let y’all drink that in for a second (but only just). I can’t even begin to imagine what I might have done, as a tender young femme, if I saw a sight such as this strolling along the beach at sunset one blustery May night years and years and years ago. At the very least, I would have pinched myself.

Tonight, we are celebrating the solar eclipse, the beginning of M’s birthday month, and the eve of summertime as marked by the petite’s last day of school, which is tomorrow  - but mostly the beginning of M’s birthday month. I found 10 of the most incredible vintage cocktail glasses during a lunchtime jaunt to a nearby thrift store, and upon coming home I promptly mixed up a round of Chapel Hill beverages, with a bottle of Hudson Manhattan Rye, Grand Marnier, and fresh-squeezed lemon juice. (We haven’t got any oranges, so the orange peel garnish was missing, alas.) I made her favorite meal and we dove into a tiramisu for dessert.

We’re now into a completely impromptu cocktail comprised of bourbon, triple sec, Domaine de Canton, a splash of orange mango juice, and a tiny little float of lemon soda. It tastes like something we’d order at Smuggler’s Cove. In short, it’s delicious.

If you haven’t yet figured it out, these are the butch companion photos to Sunday’s post! She’s wearing her Dior glasses again – something is wonky on the prescription with the Warby Parkers, so we have to get them fixed – and a very natty outfit, why I can almost see her fishing off the dock if only we had a tackle box and things with which to fish. She would fish in a tie the same way I’ve shown up to camp in stiletto boots.

How do we feel about fishing? I used to fish quite a lot when I was younger. In rivers and lakes and sometimes even wading for crawdads very many years ago. By far my favorite place to fish was tucked into a great lot of big rocks teeming with snakes on the Stuart Fork River in the Trinity Alps. Why am I even talking about this? Maybe because M’s favorite new thing is that ridiculous fool on River Monsters.

Pants: Zara
Shirt: Hurley
Sweater Vest: H&M
Tie: Calvin Klein
Shoes: Aldo
Eyeglasses: Dior Homme

LOOK AT OUR NUSTO PUPPY. Hi, Conor. Hey, Bird.

SBJ: “Bebe, do you want to talk about this shirt? The green one. You like it.”

M: “Oh, yeah! I like that one. It’s thick, like a tent made out of canvas, back when they had tents made of canvas. For hiking Mt. Everest before REI ruined everything. Ooh, Whip It is on. It only has two stars? That’s bullshit.”

SBJ: “Focus, sugar. There are details like the tiniest forest green pinstripes over the softer sage green, and those great, weighty cuffs.”

M: “No, you said COOL green and you wouldn’t let me wear it with my army green jacket. Also, it has the motorcycle patches, so you don’t get road burn.”

SBJ: “Exactly. It is a cooler green, that’s true. Your army jacket is a warm, ruddy green. They don’t mix.”

M: Audible eyeroll.

It was Monday morning when I took these. I was rinsing off in the shower quite innocently when M burst into the bathroom and cheerfully declared that it was St. Patrick’s Day. I had to brusquely remind her that it was very unfair to pinch wet, helpless, naked girls and she sheepishly retreated.

Once out of the shower, I hastily threw on a bright green dress under a pink coat and got ready to head to work. Safe! M was rushing off to make a 10AM meeting herself, but she was much too handsome, and the morning light too soft and kind, to miss. I dashed inside to fetch my camera and snapped these while she puttered around on the lawn with the dogs, chattering away happily about all the Irish whiskey she planned to drink later that night.

NEVER EVER DID IT OCCUR TO ME THAT IT WAS NOT ACTUALLY ST. PATRICK’S DAY AT ALL.

I think we ought to get a free pass on Thursday, the 17th, on the real St. Patty’s Day. What say you?

Denim: RSQ London
Belt: H&M
Cardigan: Zara
Shirt: Lifted Research Group Clothing
Boots: Lounge by Mark Nason

This little lace jacket is the best thing ever. Well, the best $24.95 I’ve ever spent at H&M, anyway. (Since the time I got this dress.) Since it’s been all Tahoe! Tahoe! Snow! Snow! here lately (you didn’t think I was done posting those, did you?), I thought I’d give y’all a wee break to show you how delightfully sunny and temperate it’s been this weekend.

It was a perfect Sunday. We slept in, made Eggos and cooked our bacon in a bit of Macallan’s short-lived Amber Whisky Liqueur, which was a very clever idea I had while lying half-awake in bed this morning. A friend gave us about 8 0z. of the precious golden liquid last night and we are savoring every delicious, pecan and maple flavored drop. I gave the dogs some much-needed baths and M tooled around the yard, and then we fetched the petite from her grandmother’s, where we all had birthday cake for her auntie.

And then we went to go and see COUNTRY STRONG, and it was fantastical. Yeah, I said it. F A N T A S T I C A L.*

*This has nothing to do with my crush on Blair, I mean Leighton.

Last night we had dinner in the wine country, Yountville to be specific, to celebrate a friend’s birthday at a restaurant called Ad Hoc (for temporary relief from hunger, you know). Yountville at night is positively enchanting, all the trees alight and the picturesque road twinkling like a pristine Mamet set just waiting to be wrecked by humanity.

Ad Hoc was bustling just the right amount when we arrived, the service was almost impeccable and the courses came out at an indulgently languorous pace – we were there for 3.5 hours! There were two highlights for me: the fried Tolenas Farm quail with blonde castelfranco radicchio and a chili garlic vinaigrette, and their magical, magical monkey bread. I’d never had monkey bread! The birthday boy, who is from Kentucky, couldn’t believe we’d never encountered it before. It was served with pecan ice cream and miles and miles of sweet, golden caramel.

We drove all the way back home and had a round of festive nightcaps at the Forbidden Island Tiki Lounge in Alameda. That’s a pic of us in our little tiki booth up there – I should have worn my coconut bra!

Nothing much else to report except my excitement at having mastered the fine craft of careless, so-what French braiding! I was going to leave them down in pigtails, but the silhouette was so interesting that I twisted them just above the nape of my neck, tucked the ends in haphazardly and pinned the mess into place. On a whim, I clipped these feathers and rhinestones in like I would fresh flowers and that was that.

Lace jacket, hair clips: H&M
Cowboy boots: Nocona
Dress: Zara

The earrings were a Christmas gift from M – dainty, faceted citrine drops with hand-hammered silver rings, the watch is Guess with a vintage band, the talon bracelet and single feather silver necklace are from Banana Republic.

When she reads this it’ll be the first time she heard it, but when we were shopping for a dress shirt and tie for M to wear on Thanksgiving, she came over to me (I think I was tenderly stroking and sighing over a plethora of leather gloves at the time) with an armful of choices and combinations, and very sincerely asked me for my opinion. I put the gloves down, redirected my focus and firmly gave her my even, thoughtful opinion.

Two things I absolutely love about us: No sugarcoating. Not ever. No gingerly dancing around, no tiptoeing on eggshells or wincing through broken glass. We call it like we see it. It isn’t a carte blanche to be unkind, not at all, but it’s beautifully honest and good grief, does it ever save us some time. Less pussyfooting, more cuddling!

That’s one thing, ranging from simple things like sartorial choices to the most deafening life choices, but there it is. The other is that we’re both terribly independent, hard-headed and stubborn, and in that vein M has always been the sort of gentleman to dress herself, and well. She knew instinctively which choice was best; when I pointed to the superior shirt-and-tie pair she nodded vigorously in agreement.

Alas, she hadn’t been 100% sure and wanted to know what I thought. Her extremely rare uncertainty made the whole thing 84,000 times more sweet and endearing. Anyway, it all turned out well, didn’t it? This getup is smart and woodsy and casual all at once. Somebody hand her a pipe and a hunting dog already.

(You are welcome for the gratuitous crotch shot. That’s some belt buckle.)

Dancing around in my Grandma’s secret garden. It was bloody cold back there!

Denim: RSQ London
Shirt: Calvin Klein
Tie: Ralph Lauren
Wool Blazer + Tie Clip: Vintage
Belt Buckle: Express
Shoes: Zara

Chauncey the Terrible! Piano times! Mussy-sikking! This concludes both parts of our Thanksgiving Day extraordinaire. Back to regularly scheduled FFAF, with an exciting holiday dress challenge posed by a devout reader and darling friend. If I had to title it, it would be:

“I know my extensive tattoos are tremendously gorgeous works of body art, but I also like to accessorize and I’ve got this amazing green party dress for the holidays. Help me work it!”

The dress is really adorable and I can’t wait to dig into this little project!